You believe that Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday are all good nights for drinking. Sunday day is also entirely reasonable.
You're always a half an hour late to work ... no-one notices or cares.
Coming to work with a hangover is entirely accepted and indeed expected at least once a week.
You can actually give directions to some of those annoying tourists in Oxford Street!
You step over a drunk in the tube station rather than offering to help them.
You don't even bother looking out of the window when you get up in the morning to check what the day is like. You know it is overcast.
You consider a suit to be normal attire for the pub.
You expect men to actually cut, comb and style their hair (using hair products). And to wear decent clothes.
You dissolve in laughter when listening to the funny accent of the Aussie international telephone operator (or on TV!).
You think £40 for a haircut is quite reasonable.
You can't remember what 'customer service' means.
After a big night out you find yourself looking for a Curry house
More than three hours sunlight on summer days seems excessive.
You don't think twice about tipping your hairdresser
You finish every sentence with 'Cheers' or 'Yeah'.
You only just realise you have lost your sunnies, you left them in Greece 2 summers ago.
You like English cuisine. I mean, it's hard to beat a full English breakfast.
You are on to your 6th umbrella and your second overcoat... this year
You've bought a disposable baby BBQ from Tesco.
A day at the beach means wearing the warmest clothes you own while standing on golf ball-size pebbles and the thought of swimming doesn't even enter your head.
You always call soccer football and you have a team and it's not Manchester United.
You don't think twice about buying a packaged sandwich.
A sunny lunchtime means searching for a patch of grass and stripping off practically down to your underwear
You've accepted queuing as a way of life.
You believe that every American is a fatass addicted to hamburgers and hotdogs.
You despise the French (but then, who doesn't?).
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Britan.
The condensation on your pint of Guinness takes the shape of shamrocks
You don't believe there is a God, but you are damn sure of the infallibility of the Pope.
You believe that to forgive is divine, but you don't excercise it yourself.
You won't eat meat on Friday, but you'll drink a pint for breakfast.
You consider any Irishman who has become successful a traitor.
You have great respect for the truth, and you only use it in emergencies.
The further you get from Ireland, the more Irish you get.
You eat homefried taters for brakfast, potato bread for lunch, and potato stew for dinner.
You cry at sad movies, but you cheer in battle.
You will never play professional basketball.
You swear very well.
You think you sing very well.
There isn't a huge difference between losing your temper and killing someone.
You're strangely poetic after a few beers.
Many of your sisters are Catherine, Elizabeth or Mary and one is Mary Catherine Elizabeth.
You can't wait for the other guy to stop talking so you can start talking.
Much of your food is boiled.
You are, or know someone, named "Murph." If you don't know Murph, then you know Mac. If you don't know Murph or Mac, then you know Sully, and you'll probably also know Sully McMurphy.
Your parents were on a first name basis with everyone at the local emergency room.
There wasn't a huge difference between your last wake and your last keg party.
You're proud to be Irish - and you pass these jokes on to all your Irish friends!